February 21, 2014
His hair smelled like the back yard. And he curled up so still in my arms, the recliner squeaking with every rock but I kept on, thinking any moment he'd jump up and be off. Legs hanging over the sides but he stayed. Flashess of feelings of when he was new, when he was two, and then they would slip from my reach. Holograms. Flickers of a distant memory and his lashes hit my cheek, I caught him looking up at me and back down again.
February 16, 2014
He's one of the helpers.
He told me the other day that he's happy when other people are happy. And that's who he is and I love it but also hate to know he bears that curse, too.
And so I thought now was as good a time as any to journal my motherhood thoughts, on just what it's like to be the mom of a teenager. Truthfully, I think it's really funny. It makes me laugh. I don't really feel any different.
I did take a nap today and slept like I'd just given birth. Deep and healthy rest, relieved... and readying for what's still to come.
Then my five year old fell asleep in my arms tonight, unexpectedly and yet, so very right on time. I held her for a long long while.
February 13, 2014
My dad never said no whenever I wanted a book, ever. I hope to always be able to do the same with my kids.
We made quite a stack at the school book fair. I'd turn our walls into a library if I could. Nothing but books. For now they are just in stacks all over the place and I love that, too.
So, we're officially Oregonians now. At least in my head I think that because we've been here a whole year. It feels like we've always lived here, this little perfect life. Funny how quickly you heal from the struggles to get to your happy place when you get to your happy place.
I am busy. A really fulfilling busy of school talent show directing, play rehearsals, work, book club, and having friends over for coffee and Mexican hot chocolate and snuggling on the couch. Yes, I have friends that snuggle. And I am not talking about my kids.
So busy I can hardly find the time to read this month's book club selection. Which looks like this:
And so I finally carved out a couple hours to read today and here I am. Taking pictures of the book. I'm on page 12.
Ok, back to reading.