I hope I don't forget how you leave your socks stuffed behind the bathroom door every time you go number two. I sigh but will it someday fade from my memory? You wrote on my to-do list yesterday "I Love my Mom" and I will save it forever.
You told me about your bedtime prayers last night and I hope you will always say them. You've started wanting to hang around the adults more now and I remember when I was ready for that, too. Standing, you are up to my chin now. My chin! I can still hear the nay of your very first cry.
This morning when I got out of bed and you were lying there on your pillow I thought you must be the definition of how He gives more than we could ever ask or imagine. I am better when we are together.
You are just like the big brother I always dreamed of having, like the ones you always see on TV or in the movies, and I wonder just where you came from and how our family got to be so lucky and you are the only one who can cheer Gray up and I don't think it's just because you want to get some laughs. You amaze me.
To Jeff, my love,
This has been a good year for us. You are more handsome than I've ever seen you, and you know me better than anyone else on this earth and you use that knowledge to take care of me. With you, I am safe.
I know my roots in music and sense of adventure are because of you, and I always wish that someone comes along to make you laugh when I don't get to talk to you, and I hope you do win the lottery some day.
To my mom,
I wish I could always be moments ahead of you, and I would drop pennies for you to find. And I wish I could go back in time and do whatever it takes to keep you from being broken. Someday when we read this again and years have passed it will be better by then, I just know. We'll celebrate the healing.