It was one of those things that caught me off guard and just snuck up on us, and we all just smiled and ached. We took a balloon and peanuts from Texas Corral to the cemetery. If you knew him, you'd think that's perfect.
I was having sadtimes last night thinking about him, and life, and how much he would love to see Ivy in dance, and how the boys have grown, Gray's new teeth, he is missing out on some awesome stuff. And they miss out on having him in their life. I miss out on him. I miss his love. I can't even begin to think about how much my mom misses him.
I lost my Gram when I was in second grade and my mind wanders to how different my life would have been if I hadn't missed out on having her in so much of my life. It just feels so unfair. And I don't understand it, so I just try not to. And I know this isn't forever, I know the promises that await. But still, that doesn't chase the tears away.