I realize as we grow up that I'm chasing my childhood, sometimes forcing traditions just so I can feel like I used to feel, even if it's just a whiff. Even if it's a half-a-second of recognition. Realizing that our lives are not like one big flat puzzle but rather layers and layers of puzzles, and that piece yesterday when I wanted to spend the morning at Mommal's having breakfast and cooking all my side dishes in her kitchen. Making it bustle, filling her house with people like it used to be. That was for somewhere deep down, near my heart.
And we watched the Macy's parade, and then headed to my Mom & Dad's. We ate so much food, and it was so good. After lunch Ivy and my niece Abby floated down the stairs in beautiful dresses. Twirling and tea partying. They pretty much refused to take them off until it was time to go.
My children find what will mean most to them about our family get togethers and I have to remember that these are their memories in the making now. Mine will just have to slip in and fill the cracks where there's room. Somehow it all makes perfect sense.