I was emailing with a friend the other day and had mentioned how I was just tired but the auto correct on my iPhone switched it to judy tired. She asked me about it and I had the biggest laugh out loud, by myself... not sure if it was my extreme exhaustion making me super loopy or what. But yeah, I guess that sounds about right. I'm judy tired.
I found myself yesterday being a bit overwhelmed by how many children I have. Maybe it was the talking-whining-tattling-yelling all at once. Or the constantly being climbed on and tugged at and, like, being needed and stuff. I just wanted to eat my salad in peace at lunch but instead I watched it be devoured by a little vulture that decided he'd rather have what I was having. And that I should feed it to him. With my fork.
I hate when I can't stand the things coming out of my mouth- who is this person?- how I sound, correcting and disciplining and ruiner of all fun. I finally had a moment where I took some cleansing breaths and soon was able to just observe Gray running up and down the yard, filling up a water can in the little pool and giggling as he'd take it to some other part of the yard to pour it out. Over and over. His eyes flashed and his smile grew and I pushed past the guilt of my earlier monster momness. He deserves so much more than my rotten attitude. And I said thankful prayers for this child, that I was witness to such a moment. Of finding joy in pretty much nothing. He's only two but he has taught me so much. I still have so much to learn.
July 7, 2008
Judy Tired
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I was watching my nieces and nephews play at the beach over the weekend, and had that same thought: wow, they find so much joy in the smallest things... I have a blog post in my mind about it, too! :-)
OK now, Judy, go get some rest. ;-)
Jane
It is comforting to hear that I'm not the only one who feels overwhelmed sometimes. I only have two little girls -- but with the Hubby gone most of the time for work, I'm alone with them ALOT. I've been trying to stop and just breathe and enjoy them. Thanks for making us all feel human :-)
That is a great action shot. He looks like he is moving fast! Great reminder at the start of my day!
That is a great action shot. He looks like he is moving fast! Great reminder at the start of my day!
Oh Stephanie, do I know how you feel! My kids must think I've got multiple personalities - I can be all happy ha ha mom, and then POOF - yelling, bitchy mom. It's so hard to deal with it all AT ONCE when all you wanna do is take a nap - uninterrupted. But that's not what life is about, apparently - very little of what I do ALL DAY LONG is ever uninterrupted. Perhaps that's why I tend to get up at 6 LOL So I CAN HAVE SOME QUIET TIME. That's mommy's time out lol
I think we all experience being the mommy monster at some point or another. Mothering isn't easy and it is overwhelming: but I think at the end of the day, as long as our children feel loved and safe, then we're doing great.
Hey, I think I'm judy tired right now! It's amazing how my personality changes when I'm missing my sleep . . . Glad you could take a step back from it.
Did you feel like a mother dog with all her puppies climbing over you?
Ugh. I know what you mean. I've been feeling a lot lately that my kids deserve so much better than the likes of me. And when I'm pregnant it's so much worse. {{{hugs}}}
I have those moments too- I am so glad that I am not alone. It is almost like you have to step outside of yourself and observe all the blessings to come back to that happy place :)
Funny title. My title this morning is Mimi Tired. You did have a very busy day yesterday, but it was a fantastic birthday lunch...just think, we got to walk away from the mess. GET SOME REST!
Goodness me, I can't even imagine being pregnant (really pregnant at that!) with three energetic boys to take care of also.
I know no one likes to make excuses for themselves, but girl I think you have the right to have overwhelming days where you don't feel like the best mom.
Our husbands have days where they aren't the best. Our kids do also. A pregnant Mom is allowed...in my opinion ;)
That picture is just fun incarnate!
Sometimes I get SO SICK of hearing myself talk that I briefly consider taking a vow of silence. THat never lasts, though.
I have days like that, too, and I only have one!
Perhaps having children is one of the ways our Lord has us growing in grace! :)
You know, it's always good to know that I am not the only one who feels this way. I often think that my kiddos deserve so much more than I can and do give them. I guess it's all part of the learning process. It's just so hard and so overwhelming when we have little ones who need us constantly, 24/7 and we never get a break. I completely understand and hear you.
thank you for making me feel like i am not alone in the overwhelmed department! (and i only have 2 boys!)
I know exactly how you feel.
Tell Judy I know just how she feels. And tell Steph that her honesty is refreshing!
Oh wow! You described me perfectly. Sometimes I can't believe how ugly I can act or be. It is nice to know that other moms feel the same way. I only have two kiddos, so YOU definitely get an award for being a patient mommie!
I so understand what you are saying. I too often think, why am I yelling at them, what am I saying. Thanks for expressing what I have had a hard time saying.
Tell me about it, hon. I have a post I'm gonna write today about something similar...
We all have those moments. I enjoyed watching Alisha (after some prodding that it would be ok) go up to some children playing ball, and ask if she could play. Watching these 5 kids play together, never having met, and probably never to meet again yet enjoying one another was so cool!
How funny. And here I thought it was just one of your crazy expressions (until, of course, you responded that you were running around the house with phone in hand). :)
I am RIGHT THERE with ya right now. Holding and hugging my little ones, feeling guilty for being monster mommy earlier... and thankful they are much more patient with me than I often am with them.
Wow you just described me! Not the typical me but the me that I've become recently. I remember feeling like this towards my students at the end of my first pregnancy so I've kind of complaining it on that. You are so right though when you mentioned just taking a few breaths and watching how little ones find joy in everything and nothing at all!
All we all feel that way for sure.
And I'm a little Judy tired myself.
Yep, my mommy monster is unleashed more times than I would like. I can relate to your post.
Oh I hate days like that. But cleansing breaths are so helpful! I hope you are able to get some much needed rest :)
Btw, I always tell my kids that if they want to do fun things then they have to obey and not make mommy yell because they aren't being good. It works most the time and only a few times of stopping the fun activity because they aren't listening is really all it takes!
Two-year olds are so sweet.
And the Judy tired cracked me up. Thanks for the laugh, and hang in
there.
Yes I feel overwhelmed especially last night when he wouldn't sleep! (he had a really late eve nap!)
But they will grow out of it and then I will be sad they grew up
Occasionally after dinner I take a Smart Ones dessert, give the kids to my husband and go eat it in peace for 15 minutes. Sometimes you just need to eat alone.
I know what you mean about the little things though.. they usually hit me when I am feeling selfish.
Thanks for stopping by and leaving get well wishes for my friend, I really appreciate it.
I hate it when I have those "snappy" mom moments where I snap at the kids and then step back and think, "why did I do that?" They are such blessings, but I definitely have to stop and actively remember that way more often than I would like.
Hope you get some rest before baby comes!
Judy tired does have a ring to it!
Oh well... we ALL have days/moments/months(ha!) like this! But one thing I know is that YOU are always seeing the "bright side." Keep it up girl!
I think Judy needs a trip to ess eff.
Wow...Judy Tired! You must be really tired...hehe
It is so easy to get overwhelmed during pregnancy so don't be so harsh in judging yourself. Take it easy girl.
I often think that it is God's gift to moms that most of our clear memories don't happen before age 3. That at least gives us a little time to figure things out. I catch myself scolding for things sometimes that, when I truly think about it, are not really battles that I choose to fight. Some spilled food here and some sand in my carpet there... no biggie in the long run. But, it is certainly a challenge to maintain perspective in the moment. You are not alone, AT ALL, in that. Thanks for sharing so openly about something we all struggle with. Those moments of joy and clarity make the others seem dim. :)
Rest your tired self!!
Oh we all have so much to learn. I know exactly what you mean...who is this crazy woman??? But thank the Lord kids are forgiving and resilient. Hang in there...it does get easier...so I hear! ;)
You definitely have a right to feeling exhausted and overwhelmed. I think a lot of us moms are going through something like this lately. The days are long, in spite of all there is to do. Longer days, shorter nights equal tired and cranky.
You are such an amazing woman and mother!
Jen
I started to leave an overly-long comment, but decided to simply say that I completely relate to this and appreciate that you share what's going on inside you so openly and honestly. Thanks for that, Steph.
We all have days like this. You are in good company. Wait until they become teenagers.
I also feel like a "ruiner of all fun" at times...bummer.
Off topic - I'm reading through your posts about vaccinations & am wondering after my son's last reactions, which make me want to bawl right now, if the effects can be reversed. Looking, but may have to go to bed... I'm judy tired.
Oh boy I have a lot to learn too!
My daughter does that to me all of the time - the eating my lunch and having me feed it to her with my fork thing. Somehow what I am eating always seems more appetizing than what is on her plate (even if it's the SAME thing that is on my plate...). :)
I have a lot to learn too.
I've been feeling the same things too - dealing with the frustration of never getting a minute to myself, and judy tired of being thumped and bumped about all the time by a constantly-active, constantly-attached child. As big and uncomfortable as I am, right now it's really impossible to enjoy her unless she's asleep or several yards away and I feel awful about that! Yet I know these are the final moments I have with just HER, and I wish I could savor them more lovingly and willingly than I am. Sigh.
You wouldn't be human if you didn't have those kind of moods or bad days. If it any consolation, I'm constantly going in and out of those funks with my two lil' ones! Who'd have thunk that mommy-hood would turn us bipolar?! The most insane part...I'm still hoping to be blessed with 2 more kids somewhere along this bumpy road of life! Hang in there - you're doing great! Try to enjoy your last few moments of this pregancy!
it is overwhelming sometimes. i find it so hard sometimes with g.g. and shep and then having to completely switch gears to give sophie my time and attention with all her pre-teen moods. i wouldn't trade it for the world but somedays it's really hard.
Sounds like a mom moment to me. We sure all go through that from time to time. And I, only have one child! Oh, what will it be like with two? :)
I know my kids are my greatest teachers. I learn something new everyday.
P.S. I had to laugh at you being "judy tired". I am the world's worst (and slowest) texter. It's quite pathetic...haha!
I definitely know that scary feeling of being overwhelmed by the children you have . . . and knowing that more are on the way. Can I do this? Can I do it well? It is hard to be everything to everyone all the time. I appreciate your honesty.
I just found your blog and WOW...I have a two and a half year old boy and my baby girl is almost one. I don't know when I became such a fun-spoiler, but it has happened! It takes a few deep breaths to bring me back to just enjoy the happiness of my children. Love it!!!
I love your blog. Why haven't I read yours before now?
I will be back...OFTEN.
Thank you for the sweet comment you left at my blog. You made my morning.
I can so totally relate to this post. I have been noticing lately how I speak to my kids, and trying to be a kinder, gentler mom.
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