January 24, 2012

Let's go down to the mermaid cafe

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"Let's stay here forever," she said.

We had made a tent out of a quilt on top of my bed, and hid inside, light from the window made all my favorite colors. And her words meant the world. And that she said them right then, there was no doubt she was just like me.

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One day Ivy came up to me so sad, with bottom lip out and she said, "Mom, I really wish I were a mermaid."

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So I knit her a tail and she wore it to bed, and she even wore it to grandma's. And earlier when she brushed her teeth the fin peeked out from around the bathroom door.

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She learned to walk up and down the stairs, holding the tail beside her. If you want anything bad enough, you figure out a way.

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Did you know how many things you can make and spell with party beads?

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Knitting pattern- "splash" from New Knits on the Block

January 23, 2012

Piece of my tooth

I vacuumed out my purse the other day.

And today I was tentatively diagnosed with anxiety and depression. I go to the lab for blood tests in the morning. Something is not right.

I sat at dinner, and looked at my family, and wanted pen and paper right there so I could start listing all the things I really love and how I so desperately want to do more of them. Like eating together. And what I won't miss. I just don't think I'll ever look back and think "I wish I watched more TV," or "I wish I spent more time on Facebook." I know I won't say I wish I did more laundry. I don't think that's possible anyway. And  I hesitated when it came to my writing. Do I wish I wrote more? Because when I don't write, I don't miss it.

Seriously I wondered if I'd finally gone and just wrote myself right off this blog. That maybe the only words I'm left holding onto were my whole truth and I'm still not ready to let them go. As good as a story I know it would make, many things are better left unwritten. And little pieces of my truth will always be more than enough.

Carter left a note under his pillow for the tooth fairy, "Piece of my tooth" with the broken tooth Scotch-taped underneath. He said he figured he should get at least a little something for it.

She left him a dime.

And he was elated.


linked up - just write

January 22, 2012

A Bedtime Story: The Karate Princess

Maybe someday I'll write again. Until then...


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